The South Pacific
Weird Telegrams 2.0 - Printable Version

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Weird Telegrams 2.0 - Somyrion - 02-09-2020

The original thread, idea credit to @Kris Kringle.

Time for some wonderful selections from my delegate inbox...

[Image: Afghanistant1.png]The Republic of Matthew is a cool kid
1 day 7 hours ago
Get more money poor boy

[Image: emu_outer_space__740604t1.png]The Free Land of EMU Outer space
2 days 7 hours ago
is worng to want be in lov e with yanderes?

In response to my join-the-WA telegram:

[Image: Defaultt1.png]The Dictatorship of Communist Republic of Daniel
2 days 10 hours ago
F**k you we are by ourselves.

At least they censored themselves! Tounge

RE: Weird Telegrams 2.0 - Somyrion - 02-09-2020

oh and

[Image: the_scp_foundation_containment_facility__66017t1.png]The Dictatorship of The SCP Foundation Containment Facility
3 days 4 hours ago
Thanks for the offer! but [Image: the_scp_foundation_containment_facility__66017t2.png]The SCP Foundation Containment Facility is a SCP facility not a nation.

I don't even know how to explain that a SCP facility should join the WA...

RE: Weird Telegrams 2.0 - Seraph - 02-09-2020

Sometimes it's the best thing about being Delegate.

RE: Weird Telegrams 2.0 - Somyrion - 02-13-2020

[Image: mecklenburg-sebulshik__507856t1.png]The Republic of Mecklenburg-Sebulshik
92 minutes ago
Thank you for the factbooks! I needed some but I just borrowed yours. Very helpful.
Not sure what 'borrowing' involves...

[Image: beautifully_made__627943t1.png]The ? ? ? ? of Beautifully made
1 day 12 hours ago
Sksksksksksk

RE: Weird Telegrams 2.0 - Somyrion - 03-02-2020


[Image: Defaultt1.png]The Free Land of Kraygon
32 minutes ago
How DARE you speak to us??!!

In response, I asked them if they had a moment to talk about Aumeltopian SPIT.   Wink

RE: Weird Telegrams 2.0 - Seraph - 03-02-2020

(03-02-2020, 12:45 AM)Somyrion Wrote:
[Image: Defaultt1.png]The Free Land of Kraygon
32 minutes ago
How DARE you speak to us??!!

In response, I asked them if they had a moment to talk about Aumeltopian SPIT.   Wink

I got the same response to my regional TG.

RE: Weird Telegrams 2.0 - Somyrion - 03-14-2020

[Image: Defaultt1.png]The Republic of Im In Charge Now Land
7 hours ago
(£L£) MONEY FROM YOU GIB ME MONEY NOW!!!!!!!!?????????????
I told them I had no money, but I did have biscuits.

And of course this one...

[Image: the_great_parkguinius__244055t1.jpg]The Holy Empire of The Great Parkguinius
5 days ago
Hello! I shall begrudgingly endorse you in hopes of one day stealing your wonderful biscuits. Thus we hope this offer of endorsement shall please you in your futile hopes of spreading good culinary skills around the world.Unfortunately the other CRS do not value the art of Biscuits and thus are primitive both in civilized culture and diplomatic intuitions. Thus we joyfully reject your second offer and cursed the every fiber of their pitiful democratic existence. If they wish for endorsements, make them bring me biscuits.-Parkguinius

RE: Weird Telegrams 2.0 - Seraph - 03-15-2020

To which I sent:

Dear Parkguinius,

It has been brought to our attention that the enlightened people of The Great Parkguinius are fond of biscuits and so, as a gesture of goodwill and/or bribery, we obsequiously send you this container ship of Erinoran Qassora-infused biscuits. Qassora cafulilea is our national spirit and its uniquely spiced and floral flavour, found in these delicate, sugar-snap biscuits, goes excellently with a cup of Earl Grey.

With biscuits,

Erinor.

The reply:

To the only slightly inferior democracy of Erinor,

While drinking our morning cup of Guiness (in preparation for saint patricks day) and bored out of our isolationist minds for something to blow up, we gladly welcome your substandard container ship into our ports. As you know there are only two things we love more than insulting democracies in this world; bribes and a good biscuit.

Therefore we can tell you, that your bribes, as insignificant as it may be, has paid off. We hope you will be pleased that we have taken down a great portrait of our Godess Aumeltopia (don't tell them we had one to begin with) and replaced it with a more self stylized and overall better looking portrait of your leader. Thus we shall endorse your tiny nation, in hopes dark omens are on the horizon.

your future overlord,

The Great Parkguinius

P.s
we are sorry about the cargo ship, but we needed something to blow up.

RE: Weird Telegrams 2.0 - Somyrion - 03-27-2020

The Empire of Asiannation1
20 minutes ago
you are weak your people are fat i will fix that

I asked them what their proposed regimen to solve this problem was.

RE: Weird Telegrams 2.0 - Somyrion - 06-16-2020

[Image: h1PId9y.png]

Nervous