Speaker: Order. We are now starting Leaders' Questions. I welcome to the chamber the Leader of the Opposition, the Leader of the Incompetent Democratic Party and the Leader of the Advanced Humanitarian League. We now have thirty-four minutes in which to ask each Leader a question, which is quite limited. Of the questions I received for today's session, I have chosen three at random per Party to ensure we are finished in time for Weekly Divisions and to allow enough time for a three minute suspension in respect of social distancing. 
   I now call on Xanatos Lobachevsky for Question Number One. Xanatos Lobachevsky.

Xanatos Lobachevsky: Question Number One, Dr. Speaker.

Speaker: The Leader of the Opposition.

Leader of the Opposition: Thank you, Dr. Speaker. I have attended meetings this morning in relation to my duties as Tax Nobody Party Leader and I will have further such meetings later today.

Speaker: Xanatos Lobachevsky.

Xanatos Lobachevsky: Thank you, Dr. Speaker. The Leader of the Opposition stated in her campaign for June 2020 that she and her Party are seeking to abolish the Universal Social Charge and to try and sway the Prime Minister to agree with them on this issue. In light of the current situation and the recession we are facing, does the right honourable lady take this back?

Speaker: The Leader of the Opposition.

Leader of the Opposition: Thank you, Dr. Speaker. I thank the honourable gentleman for his question. No, I do not take that back, this is on the Tax Nobody manifesto and as the Opposition Party in this chamber, we can only get so far with the issue, we will need some support from the Government to get this through but I somehow think that to be unlikely. In light of the situation, the people's money is running extremely low as is and the last thing they actually want is to be spending even more money that they are running out of on taxes.

Speaker: Lee Navarrete.

Lee Navarrete: Thank you, Dr. Speaker. The Government will be introducing the Rainy Day Fund later in the week to help us pull through and recover from the recession. Does the right honourable lady not agree that taxes will play a lead role in getting the country back on it's feet?

Speaker: Mental note to the Leader of the Incompetent Democrats to ready himself for the dispatch box. The Leader of the Opposition.

The Leader of the Opposition: Thank you, Dr. Speaker. I thank the honourable gentleman for his question. I actually think taxes are a very stupid idea, especially at this time. People want to keep whatever money they have and not have to spend it and I fully agree with those people.

Speaker: Last question for the Opposition, Jackie Barton.

Jackie Barton: Thank you, Dr. Speaker. Is the right honourable lady not aware of the seriousness of what she says? She wants to bring down taxes but if the Prime Minister were to approve her ideals, and she won't, let's face it, she would do more than just bring down taxes, she would bring down the entire country.

Government: Yeah.

Speaker: Order. Let's not assume the action the Prime Minister will take. The Leader of the Opposition.

Leader of the Opposition: Thank you, Dr. Speaker. I am not trying to take down the country, it's clear to me what the Government are trying to do. They claim to be fair Marxists but they are trying to make the country work for them like slaves, that's what this is about, they are not being honest with the people, our people are not slaves and they should not be treated like slaves.

Government: (Gasps).

Speaker: Ord- Ord- Ord- Order, order. Ms. Drake, I will have- Order, Ms. Drake, you are not above the Speaker, nor above the Law, sorry, Ms. Drake, I am standing, you do not stand at the same time, resume your seat, order. You must withdraw that accusation, you cannot accuse one or more people in this chamber of dishonesty. Withdraw.

Leader of the Opposition: With courtesy to yourself, I withdraw.

Government: (Annoyed).

Speaker: Order, Government, silence, please, thank you. 

Pat Mathews: You're an absolute disgrace, accusing the Government of dishonesty, an absolute disgrace!

Speaker: Mr. Mathews, am I the Speaker or are you? ORDER! The right honourable lady withdrew and I accept that, that is enough. I now ask you to withdraw what you called the right honourable lady, please.

Pat Mathews: Dr. Speaker, with the greatest respect to you, this lady knows exactly what she is saying, she knows the seriousness surrounding her ideals and she does not give a jot. She does not care. I still call her a disgrace to this chamber.

Speaker: ORDER, ORDER! Order. Mr. Mathews, that was a nasty response to the Chair's demand to withdraw. I am not a Speaker of second chances, I order the honourable member for Runswick, Pat Mathews, to withdraw immediately from the chamber for the remainder of this day's sitting.

Pat Mathews: (Leaves the chamber).

Speaker: Order, order, moving on. Government, calm down, please, things will be improved by tomorrow. We can try again. I call on Chris Shakespeare for Question Number Two. Chris Shakespeare.

Chris Shakespeare: Question Number Two, Dr. Speaker.

Speaker: The Leader of the Incompetent Democractic Party, Stephen Spencer.

Stephen Spencer: Thank you, Dr. Speaker, and may I congratulate you for the way in which you handled that little argument.

Government: (Outraged).

Speaker: Order! Government, settle down, please! Order! No, Mr. Spencer, you may not, that is not appropriate and just fuelling the argument, please get on with what you are standing at that dispatch box to do. Stephen Spencer.

Stephen Spencer: Thank you, Dr. Speaker. Earlier this morning, I had meetings with colleagues regarding my duties as the Leader of the Incompetent Democratic Party and I will have further such meetings later today.

Speaker: Chris Shakespeare.

Chris Shakespeare: Thank you, Dr. Speaker. In his campaign for June 2020, the right honourable gentleman campaigned on World Forum membership in the country. May I ask why?

Speaker: Stephen Spencer.

Stephen Spencer: Thank you, Dr. Speaker. Following the Government's recent controversies and more recent road to recovery, I thought the best way to prevent this happening again would be for the country to join the World Forum. This would be beneficial to the country because there would be someone to step in and prevent the Prime Minister becoming a dictator again, it's win-win.

Speaker: Alejandro Ebert.

Alejandro Ebert: Thank you, Dr. Speaker. Does the right honourable gentleman agree that the worst case scenario would be for the World Forum to chuck us out if we continued along the same path? If so, what is his plan for the case in which this scenario arises and what would be the point in joining the World Forum in the first place?

Speaker: Mental note to the Leader of the Advanced Humanitarian League to prepare to approach the dispatch box. Stephen Spencer.

Stephen Spencer: Thank you, Dr. Speaker. I do agree that would be the worst case scenario. In that case, I think it is in our best interests to repeatedly write to the President, as the upholder of the Constitution, and constantly seek to get their attention to do something about it as it is essentially their job to do so. We do not know these things are going to happen and if we join the World Forum and get chucked out, well, at least we tried and failed and we can hold that to our name as opposed to not trying.

Speaker: Moe Quagmire.

Moe Quagmire: Thank you, Dr. Speaker. In his campaign, the right honourable gentleman campaigned on making childcare more expensive. Why?

Speaker: Stephen Spencer.

Stephen Spencer: Thank you, Dr. Speaker. All I'm saying to the honourable gentleman is childcare is expensive and some of the money from it can go towards the Rainy Day Fund.

Incompetent Democrats: Yeah.

Speaker: Order. I now go virtually to Travis Santos for Question Number Three. Travis Santos.

Travis Santos: Question Number Three, Dr. Speaker.

Speaker: The Leader of the Advanced Humanitarian League, Harold Garcia.

Harold Garcia: Thank you, Dr. Speaker. Earlier this morning I had meetings with colleagues regarding my role as Leader of the Advanced Humanitarian League. I will have further such meetings later today.

Speaker: Travis Santos.

Travis Santos: Thank you, Dr. Speaker. May I start by welcoming the right honourable gentleman back into the chamber after ten years away? Dr. Speaker, in the right honourable gentleman's campaign for June 2020, he promised to outlaw Capital Punishment and Corporal Punishment. Is the right honourable gentleman not aware this Government have already done this?

Speaker: Harold Garcia.

Harold Garcia: Thank you, Dr. Speaker. I thank the honourable gentleman for his kind words of welcoming me back. I hope his welcoming was from the point of view of the chamber rather than the point of view of himself because he did not hold a seat in this chamber the last time I set foot in here on 1 January 2010 when I stepped down as Prime Minister. Dr. Speaker, since leaving the chamber, I have kept up to date on who has held Government and what they have got up to. I am well aware of the controversies of the second half of the 2015 term and the work that has been done to right those controversies. Dr. Speaker, I intend to find out whether the Prime Minister outlawed these two things or just removed them and if they're not outright banned, I hope to sway her towards outright banning them.

Speaker: Warwick Yoo.

Warwick Yoo: Thank you, Dr. Speaker. I'd also like to focus on a point made in the right honourable gentleman's campaign for June 2020. He promised to outlaw hunting. Is this fair?

Speaker: Harold Garcia.

Harold Garcia: Thank you, Dr. Speaker. I am appalled that the honourable gentleman should ask that question. Do animals have no rights in this country? Is it fair to hunt harmless animals for what gain? Just for fun? The Advanced Humanitarian League always has and always will condemn unnecessary harm to animals and I will be pushing the Prime Minister to ban hunting.

Speaker: Final question of today's Leaders' Questions. Boris English.

Boris English: Thank you, Dr. Speaker. The right honourable gentleman vows to ban live animals research. Why does he think the Government have not done this yet?

Speaker: Harold Garcia.

Harold Garcia: Thank you, Dr. Speaker. I think the answer simply lies in the length of our respective Parties' manifestos. We have a short and simple manifesto, not too much for things to get lost. The Modern Marxist manifesto has a lot on it and it's the Government manifesto at this time, in addition to her other duties, it keeps the Prime Minister busy. I don't think there is anything on it against banning live animal research, I think all I would need to do is mention it to the Prime Minister, she would consider it, sign off on it and pass it to the President to be signed into law, I do think it is that simple.

Speaker: Thank you, Leaders. Order. We are now approaching our Weekly Divisions. If the Leaders wish to leave the chamber, they may do so now. In order to allow for MPs to leave and enter the chamber safely, practicing social distancing, I now suspend the chamber for three minutes. Order.