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+----- Thread: Central Office of the South Pacific Grand Rabbinate of Pie (/thread-238.html)
Central Office of the South Pacific Grand Rabbinate of Pie - Kozeposlavia - 04-15-2014
WELCOME TO THE OFFICE OF THE GRAND RABBITNATE OF PIE, OY GEVALT!
Come one, come all! We are open and accepting of anyone and everyone who loves P-e! We are the unofficial official religion of the South Pacific, a strictly P-e loving and believing region! We welcome any and all converts from cake, as well as those seeking refuge from the (Oy Vey!) godless mindless heretics of the "Church of Cake"! We do not take comfort in the mindless practices of the vile murderers of the Church, we take comfort in the one truth, the revealed truth, and the only truth of P-e. We take refuge in our book, the "Oy Vey!: Or How to React When a Cakeite Challenges You to a Cooking Competition".
Our core beliefs:
- P-e is the one and only P-e
- There is no other pie before P-e
- There are only 5 prophets, Cherry, Apple, Blueberry, Peach, and Raspberry. Cake is not and never was a prophet.
- The Church of Cake has been led astray by a madman and must be shown the truth of P-e
- So as to show respect to the Great Pie in the Sky, we must always write Pie as P-e
- Any exclamation must either be followed by Oy Vey! or Oy Gevalt!
The United Communist Solar Republic
Rabbis:
[Currently Hiring]
The Cake is a lie, Oy Gevalt! We must not let the Church of Cake mislead the wonderful residents of this region, Oy Vey! Fight for Cake, whenever and wherever, Oy Vey Gevalt! To join, leave a post here and you will be added to our official roster, Oy Vey Gevalt Vey!
RE: Central Office of the South Pacific Grand Rabbinate of Pie - Ryccia - 04-15-2014
By orders of the PDA(me as sub-president of the PDA), you have been arrested for treason against cake, praising pie and creating a Church/Rabannite of Pie. You are now in PDA Jail and we will await orders of the government to either let you free or transfer you to TSP Jail and await your trial. Remember citizens, Pie is a lie! Cake is true!
RE: Central Office of the South Pacific Grand Rabbinate of Pie - Kozeposlavia - 04-15-2014
You shall never arrest me, you're kind has persecuted us pie-lovers for far too long! Oy Vey!
RE: Central Office of the South Pacific Grand Rabbinate of Pie - Ryccia - 04-15-2014
Sorry. You are in PDA Jail. *Locks him up*.
RE: Central Office of the South Pacific Grand Rabbinate of Pie - Farengeto - 04-15-2014
As MoRA and still the closest thing we have to a Chief Justice, I hereby declare this organization illegal and membership punishable by death. BY GUILLOTINE! (We just finished the French Revolution in class.
)
Central Office of the South Pacific Grand Rabbinate of Pie - Kris Kringle - 04-15-2014
Très bien Farengeto!
RE: Central Office of the South Pacific Grand Rabbinate of Pie - Kozeposlavia - 04-15-2014
ניט גוט! די ראַבאָנעס וועט האַלטן ריזיליאַנט! איר וועט ניט באַזיגן אונדז! מיר וועלן ווייַזן איר די אמת, וי געוואַלט!
RE: Central Office of the South Pacific Grand Rabbinate of Pie - Farengeto - 04-15-2014
איר אַרויספאָדערן סטראַשען מיר? איך וועט ניט זיין ינסאַלטיד.
Your Yiddish does not hide your insolence. Your call for violence will be met with equal force. I shall purge this region of heretics by fire or by blood. Convert or die!
RE: Central Office of the South Pacific Grand Rabbinate of Pie - The Union of Free Individuals - 04-16-2014
The Ice-creamists Movement for Peaceful Unification of Desserts objects most strongly to all of this! The cakists have gone too far yet again! I call upon the people of this mighty region to stand up for themselves and reject the tyranny of Cakeism! Long live TSP! Long Live Freedom of Dessert!
RE: Central Office of the South Pacific Grand Rabbinate of Pie - Ryccia - 04-16-2014
How about we arrest UFI as well? That could work.