| Poll: Why Are You Voting For Me? You do not have permission to vote in this poll. |
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| Because I Must | 5 | 38.46% | |
| Because I Must | 4 | 30.77% | |
| Because I Must | 4 | 30.77% | |
| Total | 13 vote(s) | 100% | |
| * You voted for this item. | [Show Results] |
| ABSOLUTE POWER |
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ABSOLUTE POWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER
![[Image: Rhino-Party.jpg]](https://ngtimes.ca/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/Rhino-Party.jpg) IKE FOR PRIME MINISTER: OR ELSE. WHO I AM:
My name is Maxime Baxime Mernier Bernier, but most people know me as Ike, you know, like the baby in South Park they kick around like a football. Much like that Ike, I am Canadian, and so you know that I am not to be trusted. I am the Rhinoceros Party candidate for this year's election to be Prime Minister. If I win, there will be no more elections, because I will seize power in a coup d'état, overthrow the coalition, and declare a glorious revolution to install the People's Republic of the South Pacific (Marxist-Rhinoist). Vote for me if you want to avoid the wall. MY PLATFORM: Let's face the facts: we are living in an age that is more globalized and international than ever. Products are grown in Costa Rica, packaged in the Philippines, shipped to America and excreted into their rivers. Isn't it beautiful? The twenty-first century has put an astounding amount of power into the hands of the common person, like you, I, or Jean Charest (ha! Only Canadians will get that one! Ha! Ha! Ha!). Now that we've gotten that unpleasant reality out of the way, I would like to unveil my key policy proposals which I think will address the concerns of regular South Pacificans and confront, once and for all, the array of problems facing our region today. Proposal 1: Everyone Moves To Ottawa
![[Image: 3Dj8zui.png]](https://i.imgur.com/3Dj8zui.png) See! I told you I was a genius! Look, here's the thing: Ottawa is a really boring city. Did you see when those truckers rolled in the other month and were being loud and bothersome? That's the most action we've had in 150 years! Other cities would relish the opportunity for the international spotlight, but we Ottawans wanted them out of here as soon as possible. We like our peace and quiet here, and that's exactly why I think we should move every South Pacifican to Ottawa. How do we do it? Easy. Every citizen gives somewhere between 200 and 300 dollars (CAD) to me, I put the money in my bank account, and then somehow you guys find your way over here. There are a lot of hotels downtown, but why not consider a stay in Sunny Stittsville?
![[Image: 7cp6bJw.png]](https://i.imgur.com/7cp6bJw.png) Suburban life has never been so fulfilling! What is there in Stittsville?
I'm glad you asked! There are many amenities in Stittsville that would be perfect for the average South Pacifican. You need groceries? We got a Food Basics. And a No Frills! Hungry? We boast not one, not two, but three separate Tim Horton's locations, all within one kilometre of each other! And if you wander a little further into Kanata North (no man's land, stay away), you can even find the coveted Arby's... not that you'd want to. Concerned about the cost of living? Ha! Who cares? Shrug off the crushing realities of every day life and affordability issues by taking your kids out to the rink like a true canuck! ![[Image: URLNoeK.png]](https://i.imgur.com/URLNoeK.png) We have countless services to make every single person feel at home here. Including, but not limited to:
- An orthodontist - A cafe - A Dollarama to smoke weed behind - A Shoppers Drug Mart to not smoke weed behind - An arena with a hockey rink - Little boxes on the hillside, little boxes made of ticky tacky, little boxes on the hillside, little boxes all the same - No High Schools (sorry! Your kid's getting bused a half hour either way) - A palm reader for some reason - A shop that sells flowers - McDonald's - A used car dealership And so much more! Proposal 2: Send Our Enemies To Heron Gate
![[Image: LcEIQNx.png]](https://i.imgur.com/LcEIQNx.png) Enough Said. Proposal 3: Throw A Shoe In The Air And Then Kick It Really Far Like A Soccer Ball, Then Pick It Up And Invade Whichever Direction's Pacific The Shoe Is Pointing In (Warning: We Might Invade Ourselves) Proposal 4: Proposal 5: Repeal Glen-Rhodes Conflicts of Interest:
I have been alleged to be a Grey Warden, but I can neither confirm nor deny these baseless and insulting allegations. I hold citizenship in The League, The Federation, The Empire, The Republic, The Confederation (Not The Confederacy), The Kingdom, The Commonwealth, and The.
Well that above post was an accident, whoops, but otherwise, uh, based.
Beautiful plan for TSP, full support.
If you were going to have absolute power over something, I would sincerely hope you'd do better than make us living in a fucking suburb
Minister of Foreign Affairs
General of the South Pacific Special Forces Ambassador to Balder Former Prime Minister and Minister of Defense ![[Image: rank_general.min.svg]](https://raw.githubusercontent.com/TheSouthPacific/tsp-graphics/master/mod/spsf/150w/rank_general.min.svg){kind=icon} ![[Image: updates_lifetime_3.min.svg]](https://raw.githubusercontent.com/TheSouthPacific/tsp-graphics/master/mod/spsf/150w/updates_lifetime_3.min.svg) ![[Image: detags_lifetime_4.min.svg]](https://github.com/TheSouthPacific/tsp-graphics/raw/master/mod/spsf/150w/detags_lifetime_4.min.svg) ![[Image: defenses_lifetime_4.min.svg]](https://github.com/TheSouthPacific/tsp-graphics/raw/master/mod/spsf/150w/defenses_lifetime_4.min.svg) ![[Image: ykXEqbU.png]](https://imgur.com/ykXEqbU.png)
Are Wardens/Leaguers able to go 5 minutes without trolling/flamebaiting and thinking it's funny?
(03-13-2022, 04:07 PM)sandaoguo Wrote: Are Wardens/Leaguers able to go 5 minutes without trolling/flamebaiting and thinking it's funny? A thousand mercies, me lord. This humble jester was not aware that his jokes could be heard from all the way up in thine mighty armchair. I, but a lowlife, should have been wiser than to make even the most light-hearted rib towards a genuine legende such as thyself. Prithee, me lord, spare me the dungeon and accept my prostrations. Never again shall this pond scum bother'st thee with playful jests, nor any sort of humour; thou art clearly above it all. Forsooth. |
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