You walk into the Lampshade Bar and Grill and gasp because a unicorn replaced the RandomGuy as a waiter. The unicorn snorts at you and says, "What are you looking at? Never seen a unicorn mixing drinks before?"

I answered, still surprised, "Uhm....No?"

"Well, this isn't a museum. Order or leave" answers the unicorn, rolling its eyes.

"Ok....uhm.....I'll take a BBQ-Burger and a SPIT, please."

The unicorn says, "That'll be right up. Hey you want to try something new." It shows you something sparkly...

"Uhhh.....sure."

"Good... Good...", the unicorn replies thoughtfully.

It goes into the kitchen and...brings out a cake that at first sight looks like it's a llama made out of pure sugar and cotton candy.

You stood there, surprised by the size of the cake.

Hesitatingly you take a slice, the texture is surprisingly rich and then the walls around you being to shift and change...a vortex open and when you can open your eyes you are...

On a lonely island with a nice, white beach with palm trees and a volcano.

You hear a rumbling. The volcano is beginning to erupt! The unicorn leaves through the portal, saying something about racism.

That's the moment you notice, you're black.

You turn and start to run. "What do I do?" you start screaming. Then a police car pulls up in front of you.

"Have you got a weapon?" the police officer asks you.

"Good afternoon, officer and of course not. Why would I need a weapon on this paradisial island?" You smile and try to stay calm.

"Well, maybe it's...", he suddenly has a scary look, "...not so paradisal as you think! Muahahahaha!"

You try not to laugh because the police officer seems kind of fun. "Ok, I'm young and hot and well-dressed..and unless you've got something else to say...I'm going to take a swim in the ocean."

"How dare you to speak in such a tone with me?", asked the police officer and suddenly pointed his gun towards you.

Suddenly he pulls the trigger. He smiles. You become aware that you are now hovering above both the cop and your dead body.

"Will I get into heaven now?", you ask yourself.

"That depends if you pass the job interview", says God. "There are only a certain number of positions available..."

"Ez", you say.

"What skills do you have that could possibly aid our company?" says God. "I was a waiter once?" You reply.

"Wrong. The unicorn was the waiter!"

"No, god, not at the Lampshade Bar, back when I was a student. Any way. I'm willing to bet that there isn't much need for bars in heaven, is there?"

There is an awkward silence so you try again, "Well I'm really good at customer service with a smile and you can't say no to this smile." You smile Smile

"Well, that is impressive." "So do I have the job?" "No." He shouted down to the floor. "CAN I GET SOMEONE TO ESCORT THIS GUY TO HELL?"

Something hot grabs your feet and the next thing you know, you're falling off from Heaven.

The world begins to be red and out of rock with fire and lava beneath you, but the temperature is cooler than in heaven. Welcome to hell!

You hear a disembodied voice saying, "Well that escalated Quickly."

Looking around, hell doesn't seem so bad. There's a big sign that says, "No Rulez" and people gathered at what looks like lavish party.

But you don't like parties, so you go in the opposite direction towards a lake of lava.

You go on trekking for days, until you see some people. They seem to be in the lava. You run madly towards them.

"HEY! May I join you?"

Before you realise it they have disappeared, and you are knee deep in the lava. It was a mirage. Luckily, you aren't alive so you aren't hurt.

You enjoy the coldness of the lava (in comparison to the air temperature) and lean back to relax a bit and think about the so far weird day.

You spend a few years relaxing in the lava, then you get up and decide to explore once again.

John Hills- President of Ausstan

Reply

You walk into the Lampshade Bar and Grill and gasp because a unicorn replaced the RandomGuy as a waiter. The unicorn snorts at you and says, "What are you looking at? Never seen a unicorn mixing drinks before?"

I answered, still surprised, "Uhm....No?"

"Well, this isn't a museum. Order or leave" answers the unicorn, rolling its eyes.

"Ok....uhm.....I'll take a BBQ-Burger and a SPIT, please."

The unicorn says, "That'll be right up. Hey you want to try something new." It shows you something sparkly...

"Uhhh.....sure."

"Good... Good...", the unicorn replies thoughtfully.

It goes into the kitchen and...brings out a cake that at first sight looks like it's a llama made out of pure sugar and cotton candy.

You stood there, surprised by the size of the cake.

Hesitatingly you take a slice, the texture is surprisingly rich and then the walls around you being to shift and change...a vortex open and when you can open your eyes you are...

On a lonely island with a nice, white beach with palm trees and a volcano.

You hear a rumbling. The volcano is beginning to erupt! The unicorn leaves through the portal, saying something about racism.

That's the moment you notice, you're black.

You turn and start to run. "What do I do?" you start screaming. Then a police car pulls up in front of you.

"Have you got a weapon?" the police officer asks you.

"Good afternoon, officer and of course not. Why would I need a weapon on this paradisial island?" You smile and try to stay calm.

"Well, maybe it's...", he suddenly has a scary look, "...not so paradisal as you think! Muahahahaha!"

You try not to laugh because the police officer seems kind of fun. "Ok, I'm young and hot and well-dressed..and unless you've got something else to say...I'm going to take a swim in the ocean."

"How dare you to speak in such a tone with me?", asked the police officer and suddenly pointed his gun towards you.

Suddenly he pulls the trigger. He smiles. You become aware that you are now hovering above both the cop and your dead body.

"Will I get into heaven now?", you ask yourself.

"That depends if you pass the job interview", says God. "There are only a certain number of positions available..."

"Ez", you say.

"What skills do you have that could possibly aid our company?" says God. "I was a waiter once?" You reply.

"Wrong. The unicorn was the waiter!"

"No, god, not at the Lampshade Bar, back when I was a student. Any way. I'm willing to bet that there isn't much need for bars in heaven, is there?"

There is an awkward silence so you try again, "Well I'm really good at customer service with a smile and you can't say no to this smile." You smile Smile

"Well, that is impressive." "So do I have the job?" "No." He shouted down to the floor. "CAN I GET SOMEONE TO ESCORT THIS GUY TO HELL?"

Something hot grabs your feet and the next thing you know, you're falling off from Heaven.

The world begins to be red and out of rock with fire and lava beneath you, but the temperature is cooler than in heaven. Welcome to hell!

You hear a disembodied voice saying, "Well that escalated Quickly."

Looking around, hell doesn't seem so bad. There's a big sign that says, "No Rulez" and people gathered at what looks like lavish party.

But you don't like parties, so you go in the opposite direction towards a lake of lava.

You go on trekking for days, until you see some people. They seem to be in the lava. You run madly towards them.

"HEY! May I join you?"

Before you realise it they have disappeared, and you are knee deep in the lava. It was a mirage. Luckily, you aren't alive so you aren't hurt.

You enjoy the coldness of the lava (in comparison to the air temperature) and lean back to relax a bit and think about the so far weird day.

You spend a few years relaxing in the lava, then you get up and decide to explore once again.

You go towards the north - assumed, that there is "north" in hell.

Signed
Gianluca IV
Roleplayer (active in TSP since 2016)
TSPedia-Author
Head Bartender of the Lampshade Bar & Grill


Information about my roleplay
Pacifica GI-Land, Snolland (Hazelbrust), Guardian of the World Forum, IUFA-FWC/WFWC- and Pacivision Supervisor • 
Aurora Markatt (Maura)

Reply

You walk into the Lampshade Bar and Grill and gasp because a unicorn replaced the RandomGuy as a waiter. The unicorn snorts at you and says, "What are you looking at? Never seen a unicorn mixing drinks before?"

I answered, still surprised, "Uhm....No?"

"Well, this isn't a museum. Order or leave" answers the unicorn, rolling its eyes.

"Ok....uhm.....I'll take a BBQ-Burger and a SPIT, please."

The unicorn says, "That'll be right up. Hey you want to try something new." It shows you something sparkly...

"Uhhh.....sure."

"Good... Good...", the unicorn replies thoughtfully.

It goes into the kitchen and...brings out a cake that at first sight looks like it's a llama made out of pure sugar and cotton candy.

You stood there, surprised by the size of the cake.

Hesitatingly you take a slice, the texture is surprisingly rich and then the walls around you being to shift and change...a vortex open and when you can open your eyes you are...

On a lonely island with a nice, white beach with palm trees and a volcano.

You hear a rumbling. The volcano is beginning to erupt! The unicorn leaves through the portal, saying something about racism.

That's the moment you notice, you're black.

You turn and start to run. "What do I do?" you start screaming. Then a police car pulls up in front of you.

"Have you got a weapon?" the police officer asks you.

"Good afternoon, officer and of course not. Why would I need a weapon on this paradisial island?" You smile and try to stay calm.

"Well, maybe it's...", he suddenly has a scary look, "...not so paradisal as you think! Muahahahaha!"

You try not to laugh because the police officer seems kind of fun. "Ok, I'm young and hot and well-dressed..and unless you've got something else to say...I'm going to take a swim in the ocean."

"How dare you to speak in such a tone with me?", asked the police officer and suddenly pointed his gun towards you.

Suddenly he pulls the trigger. He smiles. You become aware that you are now hovering above both the cop and your dead body.

"Will I get into heaven now?", you ask yourself.

"That depends if you pass the job interview", says God. "There are only a certain number of positions available..."

"Ez", you say.

"What skills do you have that could possibly aid our company?" says God. "I was a waiter once?" You reply.

"Wrong. The unicorn was the waiter!"

"No, god, not at the Lampshade Bar, back when I was a student. Any way. I'm willing to bet that there isn't much need for bars in heaven, is there?"

There is an awkward silence so you try again, "Well I'm really good at customer service with a smile and you can't say no to this smile." You smile Smile

"Well, that is impressive." "So do I have the job?" "No." He shouted down to the floor. "CAN I GET SOMEONE TO ESCORT THIS GUY TO HELL?"

Something hot grabs your feet and the next thing you know, you're falling off from Heaven.

The world begins to be red and out of rock with fire and lava beneath you, but the temperature is cooler than in heaven. Welcome to hell!

You hear a disembodied voice saying, "Well that escalated Quickly."

Looking around, hell doesn't seem so bad. There's a big sign that says, "No Rulez" and people gathered at what looks like lavish party.

But you don't like parties, so you go in the opposite direction towards a lake of lava.

You go on trekking for days, until you see some people. They seem to be in the lava. You run madly towards them.

"HEY! May I join you?"

Before you realise it they have disappeared, and you are knee deep in the lava. It was a mirage. Luckily, you aren't alive so you aren't hurt.

You enjoy the coldness of the lava (in comparison to the air temperature) and lean back to relax a bit and think about the so far weird day.

You spend a few years relaxing in the lava, then you get up and decide to explore once again.

You go towards the north - assumed, that there is "north" in hell.

Eventually, a few demons knock you unconscious and steal everything you own, apart from your clothes. "Could this day get any worse?" You shout.

John Hills- President of Ausstan

Reply

You walk into the Lampshade Bar and Grill and gasp because a unicorn replaced the RandomGuy as a waiter. The unicorn snorts at you and says, "What are you looking at? Never seen a unicorn mixing drinks before?"

I answered, still surprised, "Uhm....No?"

"Well, this isn't a museum. Order or leave" answers the unicorn, rolling its eyes.

"Ok....uhm.....I'll take a BBQ-Burger and a SPIT, please."

The unicorn says, "That'll be right up. Hey you want to try something new." It shows you something sparkly...

"Uhhh.....sure."

"Good... Good...", the unicorn replies thoughtfully.

It goes into the kitchen and...brings out a cake that at first sight looks like it's a llama made out of pure sugar and cotton candy.

You stood there, surprised by the size of the cake.

Hesitatingly you take a slice, the texture is surprisingly rich and then the walls around you being to shift and change...a vortex open and when you can open your eyes you are...

On a lonely island with a nice, white beach with palm trees and a volcano.

You hear a rumbling. The volcano is beginning to erupt! The unicorn leaves through the portal, saying something about racism.

That's the moment you notice, you're black.

You turn and start to run. "What do I do?" you start screaming. Then a police car pulls up in front of you.

"Have you got a weapon?" the police officer asks you.

"Good afternoon, officer and of course not. Why would I need a weapon on this paradisial island?" You smile and try to stay calm.

"Well, maybe it's...", he suddenly has a scary look, "...not so paradisal as you think! Muahahahaha!"

You try not to laugh because the police officer seems kind of fun. "Ok, I'm young and hot and well-dressed..and unless you've got something else to say...I'm going to take a swim in the ocean."

"How dare you to speak in such a tone with me?", asked the police officer and suddenly pointed his gun towards you.

Suddenly he pulls the trigger. He smiles. You become aware that you are now hovering above both the cop and your dead body.

"Will I get into heaven now?", you ask yourself.

"That depends if you pass the job interview", says God. "There are only a certain number of positions available..."

"Ez", you say.

"What skills do you have that could possibly aid our company?" says God. "I was a waiter once?" You reply.

"Wrong. The unicorn was the waiter!"

"No, god, not at the Lampshade Bar, back when I was a student. Any way. I'm willing to bet that there isn't much need for bars in heaven, is there?"

There is an awkward silence so you try again, "Well I'm really good at customer service with a smile and you can't say no to this smile." You smile Smile

"Well, that is impressive." "So do I have the job?" "No." He shouted down to the floor. "CAN I GET SOMEONE TO ESCORT THIS GUY TO HELL?"

Something hot grabs your feet and the next thing you know, you're falling off from Heaven.

The world begins to be red and out of rock with fire and lava beneath you, but the temperature is cooler than in heaven. Welcome to hell!

You hear a disembodied voice saying, "Well that escalated Quickly."

Looking around, hell doesn't seem so bad. There's a big sign that says, "No Rulez" and people gathered at what looks like lavish party.

But you don't like parties, so you go in the opposite direction towards a lake of lava.

You go on trekking for days, until you see some people. They seem to be in the lava. You run madly towards them.

"HEY! May I join you?"

Before you realise it they have disappeared, and you are knee deep in the lava. It was a mirage. Luckily, you aren't alive so you aren't hurt.

You enjoy the coldness of the lava (in comparison to the air temperature) and lean back to relax a bit and think about the so far weird day.

You spend a few years relaxing in the lava, then you get up and decide to explore once again.

You go towards the north - assumed, that there is "north" in hell.

Eventually, a few demons knock you unconscious and steal everything you own, apart from your clothes. "Could this day get any worse?", you shout.

And yes, it totally can.

Signed
Gianluca IV
Roleplayer (active in TSP since 2016)
TSPedia-Author
Head Bartender of the Lampshade Bar & Grill


Information about my roleplay
Pacifica GI-Land, Snolland (Hazelbrust), Guardian of the World Forum, IUFA-FWC/WFWC- and Pacivision Supervisor • 
Aurora Markatt (Maura)

Reply

You walk into the Lampshade Bar and Grill and gasp because a unicorn replaced the RandomGuy as a waiter. The unicorn snorts at you and says, "What are you looking at? Never seen a unicorn mixing drinks before?"

I answered, still surprised, "Uhm....No?"

"Well, this isn't a museum. Order or leave" answers the unicorn, rolling its eyes.

"Ok....uhm.....I'll take a BBQ-Burger and a SPIT, please."

The unicorn says, "That'll be right up. Hey you want to try something new." It shows you something sparkly...

"Uhhh.....sure."

"Good... Good...", the unicorn replies thoughtfully.

It goes into the kitchen and...brings out a cake that at first sight looks like it's a llama made out of pure sugar and cotton candy.

You stood there, surprised by the size of the cake.

Hesitatingly you take a slice, the texture is surprisingly rich and then the walls around you being to shift and change...a vortex open and when you can open your eyes you are...

On a lonely island with a nice, white beach with palm trees and a volcano.

You hear a rumbling. The volcano is beginning to erupt! The unicorn leaves through the portal, saying something about racism.

That's the moment you notice, you're black.

You turn and start to run. "What do I do?" you start screaming. Then a police car pulls up in front of you.

"Have you got a weapon?" the police officer asks you.

"Good afternoon, officer and of course not. Why would I need a weapon on this paradisial island?" You smile and try to stay calm.

"Well, maybe it's...", he suddenly has a scary look, "...not so paradisal as you think! Muahahahaha!"

You try not to laugh because the police officer seems kind of fun. "Ok, I'm young and hot and well-dressed..and unless you've got something else to say...I'm going to take a swim in the ocean."

"How dare you to speak in such a tone with me?", asked the police officer and suddenly pointed his gun towards you.

Suddenly he pulls the trigger. He smiles. You become aware that you are now hovering above both the cop and your dead body.

"Will I get into heaven now?", you ask yourself.

"That depends if you pass the job interview", says God. "There are only a certain number of positions available..."

"Ez", you say.

"What skills do you have that could possibly aid our company?" says God. "I was a waiter once?" You reply.

"Wrong. The unicorn was the waiter!"

"No, god, not at the Lampshade Bar, back when I was a student. Any way. I'm willing to bet that there isn't much need for bars in heaven, is there?"

There is an awkward silence so you try again, "Well I'm really good at customer service with a smile and you can't say no to this smile." You smile Smile

"Well, that is impressive." "So do I have the job?" "No." He shouted down to the floor. "CAN I GET SOMEONE TO ESCORT THIS GUY TO HELL?"

Something hot grabs your feet and the next thing you know, you're falling off from Heaven.

The world begins to be red and out of rock with fire and lava beneath you, but the temperature is cooler than in heaven. Welcome to hell!

You hear a disembodied voice saying, "Well that escalated Quickly."

Looking around, hell doesn't seem so bad. There's a big sign that says, "No Rulez" and people gathered at what looks like lavish party.

But you don't like parties, so you go in the opposite direction towards a lake of lava.

You go on trekking for days, until you see some people. They seem to be in the lava. You run madly towards them.

"HEY! May I join you?"

Before you realise it they have disappeared, and you are knee deep in the lava. It was a mirage. Luckily, you aren't alive so you aren't hurt.

You enjoy the coldness of the lava (in comparison to the air temperature) and lean back to relax a bit and think about the so far weird day.

You spend a few years relaxing in the lava, then you get up and decide to explore once again.

You go towards the north - assumed, that there is "north" in hell.

Eventually, a few demons knock you unconscious and steal everything you own, apart from your clothes. "Could this day get any worse?", you shout.

And yes, it totally can.

You see Satan up ahead of you. And this time it's not a mirage.

John Hills- President of Ausstan

Reply

You walk into the Lampshade Bar and Grill and gasp because a unicorn replaced the RandomGuy as a waiter. The unicorn snorts at you and says, "What are you looking at? Never seen a unicorn mixing drinks before?"

I answered, still surprised, "Uhm....No?"

"Well, this isn't a museum. Order or leave" answers the unicorn, rolling its eyes.

"Ok....uhm.....I'll take a BBQ-Burger and a SPIT, please."

The unicorn says, "That'll be right up. Hey you want to try something new." It shows you something sparkly...

"Uhhh.....sure."

"Good... Good...", the unicorn replies thoughtfully.

It goes into the kitchen and...brings out a cake that at first sight looks like it's a llama made out of pure sugar and cotton candy.

You stood there, surprised by the size of the cake.

Hesitatingly you take a slice, the texture is surprisingly rich and then the walls around you being to shift and change...a vortex open and when you can open your eyes you are...

On a lonely island with a nice, white beach with palm trees and a volcano.

You hear a rumbling. The volcano is beginning to erupt! The unicorn leaves through the portal, saying something about racism.

That's the moment you notice, you're black.

You turn and start to run. "What do I do?" you start screaming. Then a police car pulls up in front of you.

"Have you got a weapon?" the police officer asks you.

"Good afternoon, officer and of course not. Why would I need a weapon on this paradisial island?" You smile and try to stay calm.

"Well, maybe it's...", he suddenly has a scary look, "...not so paradisal as you think! Muahahahaha!"

You try not to laugh because the police officer seems kind of fun. "Ok, I'm young and hot and well-dressed..and unless you've got something else to say...I'm going to take a swim in the ocean."

"How dare you to speak in such a tone with me?", asked the police officer and suddenly pointed his gun towards you.

Suddenly he pulls the trigger. He smiles. You become aware that you are now hovering above both the cop and your dead body.

"Will I get into heaven now?", you ask yourself.

"That depends if you pass the job interview", says God. "There are only a certain number of positions available..."

"Ez", you say.

"What skills do you have that could possibly aid our company?" says God. "I was a waiter once?" You reply.

"Wrong. The unicorn was the waiter!"

"No, god, not at the Lampshade Bar, back when I was a student. Any way. I'm willing to bet that there isn't much need for bars in heaven, is there?"

There is an awkward silence so you try again, "Well I'm really good at customer service with a smile and you can't say no to this smile." You smile Smile

"Well, that is impressive." "So do I have the job?" "No." He shouted down to the floor. "CAN I GET SOMEONE TO ESCORT THIS GUY TO HELL?"

Something hot grabs your feet and the next thing you know, you're falling off from Heaven.

The world begins to be red and out of rock with fire and lava beneath you, but the temperature is cooler than in heaven. Welcome to hell!

You hear a disembodied voice saying, "Well that escalated Quickly."

Looking around, hell doesn't seem so bad. There's a big sign that says, "No Rulez" and people gathered at what looks like lavish party.

But you don't like parties, so you go in the opposite direction towards a lake of lava.

You go on trekking for days, until you see some people. They seem to be in the lava. You run madly towards them.

"HEY! May I join you?"

Before you realise it they have disappeared, and you are knee deep in the lava. It was a mirage. Luckily, you aren't alive so you aren't hurt.

You enjoy the coldness of the lava (in comparison to the air temperature) and lean back to relax a bit and think about the so far weird day.

You spend a few years relaxing in the lava, then you get up and decide to explore once again.

You go towards the north - assumed, that there is "north" in hell.

Eventually, a few demons knock you unconscious and steal everything you own, apart from your clothes. "Could this day get any worse?", you shout.

And yes, it totally can.

You see Satan up ahead of you. And this time it's not a mirage.

"Hey son, I was hoping to see you back here. What's up?" Satan asks.

Escade

~ Positions Held in TSP ~
Delegate | Vice Delegate 
Minister of Regional Affairs, | Minister of Foreign Affairs | Minister of Military Affairs
~ The Sparkly One ~

My Pinterest

 

Reply

You walk into the Lampshade Bar and Grill and gasp because a unicorn replaced the RandomGuy as a waiter. The unicorn snorts at you and says, "What are you looking at? Never seen a unicorn mixing drinks before?"

I answered, still surprised, "Uhm....No?"

"Well, this isn't a museum. Order or leave" answers the unicorn, rolling its eyes.

"Ok....uhm.....I'll take a BBQ-Burger and a SPIT, please."

The unicorn says, "That'll be right up. Hey you want to try something new." It shows you something sparkly...

"Uhhh.....sure."

"Good... Good...", the unicorn replies thoughtfully.

It goes into the kitchen and...brings out a cake that at first sight looks like it's a llama made out of pure sugar and cotton candy.

You stood there, surprised by the size of the cake.

Hesitatingly you take a slice, the texture is surprisingly rich and then the walls around you being to shift and change...a vortex open and when you can open your eyes you are...

On a lonely island with a nice, white beach with palm trees and a volcano.

You hear a rumbling. The volcano is beginning to erupt! The unicorn leaves through the portal, saying something about racism.

That's the moment you notice, you're black.

You turn and start to run. "What do I do?" you start screaming. Then a police car pulls up in front of you.

"Have you got a weapon?" the police officer asks you.

"Good afternoon, officer and of course not. Why would I need a weapon on this paradisial island?" You smile and try to stay calm.

"Well, maybe it's...", he suddenly has a scary look, "...not so paradisal as you think! Muahahahaha!"

You try not to laugh because the police officer seems kind of fun. "Ok, I'm young and hot and well-dressed..and unless you've got something else to say...I'm going to take a swim in the ocean."

"How dare you to speak in such a tone with me?", asked the police officer and suddenly pointed his gun towards you.

Suddenly he pulls the trigger. He smiles. You become aware that you are now hovering above both the cop and your dead body.

"Will I get into heaven now?", you ask yourself.

"That depends if you pass the job interview", says God. "There are only a certain number of positions available..."

"Ez", you say.

"What skills do you have that could possibly aid our company?" says God. "I was a waiter once?" You reply.

"Wrong. The unicorn was the waiter!"

"No, god, not at the Lampshade Bar, back when I was a student. Any way. I'm willing to bet that there isn't much need for bars in heaven, is there?"

There is an awkward silence so you try again, "Well I'm really good at customer service with a smile and you can't say no to this smile." You smile Smile

"Well, that is impressive." "So do I have the job?" "No." He shouted down to the floor. "CAN I GET SOMEONE TO ESCORT THIS GUY TO HELL?"

Something hot grabs your feet and the next thing you know, you're falling off from Heaven.

The world begins to be red and out of rock with fire and lava beneath you, but the temperature is cooler than in heaven. Welcome to hell!

You hear a disembodied voice saying, "Well that escalated Quickly."

Looking around, hell doesn't seem so bad. There's a big sign that says, "No Rulez" and people gathered at what looks like lavish party.

But you don't like parties, so you go in the opposite direction towards a lake of lava.

You go on trekking for days, until you see some people. They seem to be in the lava. You run madly towards them.

"HEY! May I join you?"

Before you realise it they have disappeared, and you are knee deep in the lava. It was a mirage. Luckily, you aren't alive so you aren't hurt.

You enjoy the coldness of the lava (in comparison to the air temperature) and lean back to relax a bit and think about the so far weird day.

You spend a few years relaxing in the lava, then you get up and decide to explore once again.

You go towards the north - assumed, that there is "north" in hell.

Eventually, a few demons knock you unconscious and steal everything you own, apart from your clothes. "Could this day get any worse?", you shout.

And yes, it totally can.

You see Satan up ahead of you. And this time it's not a mirage.

"Hey son, I was hoping to see you back here. What's up?" Satan asks.

Dramatic music plays in background

John Hills- President of Ausstan

Reply

You walk into the Lampshade Bar and Grill and gasp because a unicorn replaced the RandomGuy as a waiter. The unicorn snorts at you and says, "What are you looking at? Never seen a unicorn mixing drinks before?"

I answered, still surprised, "Uhm....No?"

"Well, this isn't a museum. Order or leave" answers the unicorn, rolling its eyes.

"Ok....uhm.....I'll take a BBQ-Burger and a SPIT, please."

The unicorn says, "That'll be right up. Hey you want to try something new." It shows you something sparkly...

"Uhhh.....sure."

"Good... Good...", the unicorn replies thoughtfully.

It goes into the kitchen and...brings out a cake that at first sight looks like it's a llama made out of pure sugar and cotton candy.

You stood there, surprised by the size of the cake.

Hesitatingly you take a slice, the texture is surprisingly rich and then the walls around you being to shift and change...a vortex open and when you can open your eyes you are...

On a lonely island with a nice, white beach with palm trees and a volcano.

You hear a rumbling. The volcano is beginning to erupt! The unicorn leaves through the portal, saying something about racism.

That's the moment you notice, you're black.

You turn and start to run. "What do I do?" you start screaming. Then a police car pulls up in front of you.

"Have you got a weapon?" the police officer asks you.

"Good afternoon, officer and of course not. Why would I need a weapon on this paradisial island?" You smile and try to stay calm.

"Well, maybe it's...", he suddenly has a scary look, "...not so paradisal as you think! Muahahahaha!"

You try not to laugh because the police officer seems kind of fun. "Ok, I'm young and hot and well-dressed..and unless you've got something else to say...I'm going to take a swim in the ocean."

"How dare you to speak in such a tone with me?", asked the police officer and suddenly pointed his gun towards you.

Suddenly he pulls the trigger. He smiles. You become aware that you are now hovering above both the cop and your dead body.

"Will I get into heaven now?", you ask yourself.

"That depends if you pass the job interview", says God. "There are only a certain number of positions available..."

"Ez", you say.

"What skills do you have that could possibly aid our company?" says God. "I was a waiter once?" You reply.

"Wrong. The unicorn was the waiter!"

"No, god, not at the Lampshade Bar, back when I was a student. Any way. I'm willing to bet that there isn't much need for bars in heaven, is there?"

There is an awkward silence so you try again, "Well I'm really good at customer service with a smile and you can't say no to this smile." You smile Smile

"Well, that is impressive." "So do I have the job?" "No." He shouted down to the floor. "CAN I GET SOMEONE TO ESCORT THIS GUY TO HELL?"

Something hot grabs your feet and the next thing you know, you're falling off from Heaven.

The world begins to be red and out of rock with fire and lava beneath you, but the temperature is cooler than in heaven. Welcome to hell!

You hear a disembodied voice saying, "Well that escalated Quickly."

Looking around, hell doesn't seem so bad. There's a big sign that says, "No Rulez" and people gathered at what looks like lavish party.

But you don't like parties, so you go in the opposite direction towards a lake of lava.

You go on trekking for days, until you see some people. They seem to be in the lava. You run madly towards them.

"HEY! May I join you?"

Before you realise it they have disappeared, and you are knee deep in the lava. It was a mirage. Luckily, you aren't alive so you aren't hurt.

You enjoy the coldness of the lava (in comparison to the air temperature) and lean back to relax a bit and think about the so far weird day.

You spend a few years relaxing in the lava, then you get up and decide to explore once again.

You go towards the north - assumed, that there is "north" in hell.

Eventually, a few demons knock you unconscious and steal everything you own, apart from your clothes. "Could this day get any worse?", you shout.

And yes, it totally can.

You see Satan up ahead of you. And this time it's not a mirage.

"Hey son, I was hoping to see you back here. What's up?" Satan asks.

Dramatic music plays in background.

You flex and try not to roll your eyes. Good old dad, never letting you be a rebel without a cause and all. "Don't tell me you didn't have anything to do with a cop showing up on a Bermudan island and popping me in the head. I could practically smell the sulfur."

Escade

~ Positions Held in TSP ~
Delegate | Vice Delegate 
Minister of Regional Affairs, | Minister of Foreign Affairs | Minister of Military Affairs
~ The Sparkly One ~

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You walk into the Lampshade Bar and Grill and gasp because a unicorn replaced the RandomGuy as a waiter. The unicorn snorts at you and says, "What are you looking at? Never seen a unicorn mixing drinks before?"

I answered, still surprised, "Uhm....No?"

"Well, this isn't a museum. Order or leave" answers the unicorn, rolling its eyes.

"Ok....uhm.....I'll take a BBQ-Burger and a SPIT, please."

The unicorn says, "That'll be right up. Hey you want to try something new." It shows you something sparkly...

"Uhhh.....sure."

"Good... Good...", the unicorn replies thoughtfully.

It goes into the kitchen and...brings out a cake that at first sight looks like it's a llama made out of pure sugar and cotton candy.

You stood there, surprised by the size of the cake.

Hesitatingly you take a slice, the texture is surprisingly rich and then the walls around you being to shift and change...a vortex open and when you can open your eyes you are...

On a lonely island with a nice, white beach with palm trees and a volcano.

You hear a rumbling. The volcano is beginning to erupt! The unicorn leaves through the portal, saying something about racism.

That's the moment you notice, you're black.

You turn and start to run. "What do I do?" you start screaming. Then a police car pulls up in front of you.

"Have you got a weapon?" the police officer asks you.

"Good afternoon, officer and of course not. Why would I need a weapon on this paradisial island?" You smile and try to stay calm.

"Well, maybe it's...", he suddenly has a scary look, "...not so paradisal as you think! Muahahahaha!"

You try not to laugh because the police officer seems kind of fun. "Ok, I'm young and hot and well-dressed..and unless you've got something else to say...I'm going to take a swim in the ocean."

"How dare you to speak in such a tone with me?", asked the police officer and suddenly pointed his gun towards you.

Suddenly he pulls the trigger. He smiles. You become aware that you are now hovering above both the cop and your dead body.

"Will I get into heaven now?", you ask yourself.

"That depends if you pass the job interview", says God. "There are only a certain number of positions available..."

"Ez", you say.

"What skills do you have that could possibly aid our company?" says God. "I was a waiter once?" You reply.

"Wrong. The unicorn was the waiter!"

"No, god, not at the Lampshade Bar, back when I was a student. Any way. I'm willing to bet that there isn't much need for bars in heaven, is there?"

There is an awkward silence so you try again, "Well I'm really good at customer service with a smile and you can't say no to this smile." You smile Smile

"Well, that is impressive." "So do I have the job?" "No." He shouted down to the floor. "CAN I GET SOMEONE TO ESCORT THIS GUY TO HELL?"

Something hot grabs your feet and the next thing you know, you're falling off from Heaven.

The world begins to be red and out of rock with fire and lava beneath you, but the temperature is cooler than in heaven. Welcome to hell!

You hear a disembodied voice saying, "Well that escalated Quickly."

Looking around, hell doesn't seem so bad. There's a big sign that says, "No Rulez" and people gathered at what looks like lavish party.

But you don't like parties, so you go in the opposite direction towards a lake of lava.

You go on trekking for days, until you see some people. They seem to be in the lava. You run madly towards them.

"HEY! May I join you?"

Before you realise it they have disappeared, and you are knee deep in the lava. It was a mirage. Luckily, you aren't alive so you aren't hurt.

You enjoy the coldness of the lava (in comparison to the air temperature) and lean back to relax a bit and think about the so far weird day.

You spend a few years relaxing in the lava, then you get up and decide to explore once again.

You go towards the north - assumed, that there is "north" in hell.

Eventually, a few demons knock you unconscious and steal everything you own, apart from your clothes. "Could this day get any worse?", you shout.

And yes, it totally can.

You see Satan up ahead of you. And this time it's not a mirage.

"Hey son, I was hoping to see you back here. What's up?" Satan asks.

Dramatic music plays in background.

You flex and try not to roll your eyes. Good old dad, never letting you be a rebel without a cause and all. "Don't tell me you didn't have anything to do with a cop showing up on a Bermudan island and popping me in the head. I could practically smell the sulfur."

"Erm... No?" Well. He was never a good liar, but this was just bad. Ever since business went bad, your father had been acting strangely. He would blame it on the lowered crime rates.

John Hills- President of Ausstan

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You walk into the Lampshade Bar and Grill and gasp because a unicorn replaced the RandomGuy as a waiter. The unicorn snorts at you and says, "What are you looking at? Never seen a unicorn mixing drinks before?"

I answered, still surprised, "Uhm....No?"

"Well, this isn't a museum. Order or leave" answers the unicorn, rolling its eyes.

"Ok....uhm.....I'll take a BBQ-Burger and a SPIT, please."

The unicorn says, "That'll be right up. Hey you want to try something new." It shows you something sparkly...

"Uhhh.....sure."

"Good... Good...", the unicorn replies thoughtfully.

It goes into the kitchen and...brings out a cake that at first sight looks like it's a llama made out of pure sugar and cotton candy.

You stood there, surprised by the size of the cake.

Hesitatingly you take a slice, the texture is surprisingly rich and then the walls around you being to shift and change...a vortex open and when you can open your eyes you are...

On a lonely island with a nice, white beach with palm trees and a volcano.

You hear a rumbling. The volcano is beginning to erupt! The unicorn leaves through the portal, saying something about racism.

That's the moment you notice, you're black.

You turn and start to run. "What do I do?" you start screaming. Then a police car pulls up in front of you.

"Have you got a weapon?" the police officer asks you.

"Good afternoon, officer and of course not. Why would I need a weapon on this paradisial island?" You smile and try to stay calm.

"Well, maybe it's...", he suddenly has a scary look, "...not so paradisal as you think! Muahahahaha!"

You try not to laugh because the police officer seems kind of fun. "Ok, I'm young and hot and well-dressed..and unless you've got something else to say...I'm going to take a swim in the ocean."

"How dare you to speak in such a tone with me?", asked the police officer and suddenly pointed his gun towards you.

Suddenly he pulls the trigger. He smiles. You become aware that you are now hovering above both the cop and your dead body.

"Will I get into heaven now?", you ask yourself.

"That depends if you pass the job interview", says God. "There are only a certain number of positions available..."

"Ez", you say.

"What skills do you have that could possibly aid our company?" says God. "I was a waiter once?" You reply.

"Wrong. The unicorn was the waiter!"

"No, god, not at the Lampshade Bar, back when I was a student. Any way. I'm willing to bet that there isn't much need for bars in heaven, is there?"

There is an awkward silence so you try again, "Well I'm really good at customer service with a smile and you can't say no to this smile." You smile Smile

"Well, that is impressive." "So do I have the job?" "No." He shouted down to the floor. "CAN I GET SOMEONE TO ESCORT THIS GUY TO HELL?"

Something hot grabs your feet and the next thing you know, you're falling off from Heaven.

The world begins to be red and out of rock with fire and lava beneath you, but the temperature is cooler than in heaven. Welcome to hell!

You hear a disembodied voice saying, "Well that escalated Quickly."

Looking around, hell doesn't seem so bad. There's a big sign that says, "No Rulez" and people gathered at what looks like lavish party.

But you don't like parties, so you go in the opposite direction towards a lake of lava.

You go on trekking for days, until you see some people. They seem to be in the lava. You run madly towards them.

"HEY! May I join you?"

Before you realise it they have disappeared, and you are knee deep in the lava. It was a mirage. Luckily, you aren't alive so you aren't hurt.

You enjoy the coldness of the lava (in comparison to the air temperature) and lean back to relax a bit and think about the so far weird day.

You spend a few years relaxing in the lava, then you get up and decide to explore once again.

You go towards the north - assumed, that there is "north" in hell.

Eventually, a few demons knock you unconscious and steal everything you own, apart from your clothes. "Could this day get any worse?", you shout.

And yes, it totally can.

You see Satan up ahead of you. And this time it's not a mirage.

"Hey son, I was hoping to see you back here. What's up?" Satan asks.

Dramatic music plays in background.

You flex and try not to roll your eyes. Good old dad, never letting you be a rebel without a cause and all. "Don't tell me you didn't have anything to do with a cop showing up on a Bermudan island and popping me in the head. I could practically smell the sulfur."

"Erm... No?" Well. He was never a good liar, but this was just bad. Ever since business went bad, your father had been acting strangely. He would blame it on the lowered crime rates.

"Don't lie to me, son or otherwise, you'll have to work in the sulfur-mines, do you remember?"

Signed
Gianluca IV
Roleplayer (active in TSP since 2016)
TSPedia-Author
Head Bartender of the Lampshade Bar & Grill


Information about my roleplay
Pacifica GI-Land, Snolland (Hazelbrust), Guardian of the World Forum, IUFA-FWC/WFWC- and Pacivision Supervisor • 
Aurora Markatt (Maura)

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